J. B. Lightfoot on Colossians 3:17-22

ἐν Κυρίῳ. ^{19}Οἱ ἄνδρες, ἀγαπᾶτε τὰς γυναῖκας καὶ μὴ πικραίνεσθε πρὸς αὐτάς. ^{20}Τὰ τέκνα, ὑπακούετε τοῖς γονεῦσιν κατὰ πάντα· τοῦτο γὰρ εὐάρεστόν ἐστιν ἐν Κυρίῳ. ^{21}Οἱ πατέρες, μὴ ἐρεθίζετε τὰ τέκνα ὑμῶν, ἵνα μὴ ἀθυμῶσιν. ^{22}Οἱ δοῦλοι, ὑπακούετε κατὰ πάντα ἀνῆκεν] The imperfect, as Ephes. v. 4 ἃ οὐκ ἀνῆκεν (the correct reading); comp. _Clem. Hom._ Contest. 3 τοῦδε μὴ μεταδοῦναι χάριν, ὡς οὐ προσῆκεν, Xen. _de Re Equestr._ xii. 14 ἃ ἱππάρχῳ προσῆκεν εἰδέναι τε καὶ πράττειν; and see D’Orville on Charito viii. 2 (p. 699 sq.). The common uses of the imperfect ἔδει, ἔπρεπεν, etc., in classical writers do not present a very exact parallel; for they imply that the thing which ought to have been done has been left undone. And so we might interpret Acts xxii. 22 οὐ γὰρ καθῆκεν αὐτὸν ζῆν (the correct reading). Here however there can hardly be any such reference; and the best illustration is the English past tense ‘ought’ (= ‘owed’), which is used in the same way. The past tense perhaps implies an essential _à priori_ obligation. The use of χρῆν, ἔχρην, occasionally approximates to this; e.g. Eur. _Andr._ 423. The idea of ‘propriety’ is the link which connects the primary meaning of such words as ἀνήκειν, προσήκειν, καθήκειν, ‘aiming at or pertaining to’, with their ultimate meaning of moral obligation. The word ἀνήκειν occurs in the New Testament only here and in the contemporary epistles, Ephes. v. 4, Philem. 8. ἐν Κυρίῳ] probably to be connected with ὡς ἀνῆκεν, rather than with ὑποτάσσεσθε; comp. ver. 20 εὐάρεστόν ἐστιν ἐν Κυρίῳ. 19. μὴ πικραίνεσθε κ.τ.λ.] ‘_show no bitterness, behave not harshly_’; comp. Lynceus in Athen. vi. p. 242 C πικρανθείη πρός τινα τῶν συζώντων, Joseph. _Ant._ v. 7. I δεινῶς πρὸς τοὺς τοῦ δικαίου προϊσταμένους ἐκπικραινόμενος, Plut. _Mor._ p. 457 A πρὸς γύναια διαπικραίνονται. So also πικραίνεσθαι ἐπί τινα in the LXX, Jerem. xliv (xxxvii). 15, 3 Esdr. iv. 31. This verb πικραίνεσθαι and its compounds occur frequently in classical writers. 20. κατὰ πάντα] as ver. 22. The rule is stated absolutely, because the exceptions are so few that they may be disregarded. εὐάρεστόν ἐστιν] ‘_is well pleasing, commendable_’. The received text supplies this adjective with a dative of reference τῷ Κυρίῳ (from Ephes. v. 10), but ἐν Κυρίῳ is unquestionably the right reading. With the reading thus corrected εὐάρεστον, like ἀνῆκεν ver. 18, must be taken absolutely, as perhaps in Rom. xii. 2 τὸ θέλημα τοῦ Θἑοῦ τὸ ἀγαθὸν καὶ εὐάρεστον καὶ τέλειον: comp. Phil. iv. 8 ὅσα σεμνά ... ὅσα προσφιλῆ. The qualification ἐν Κυρίῳ implies ‘as judged by a Christian standard’, ‘as judged by those who are members of Christ’s body.’ 21. ἐρεθίζετε] ‘_provoke, irritate_’. The other reading παροργίζετε has higher support, but is doubtless taken from the parallel passage, Ephes. vi. 4. ‘Irritation’ is the first consequence of being too exacting with children, and irritation leads to moroseness (ἀθυμία). In 2 Cor. IX. 2 ἐρεθίζειν is used in a good sense and produces the opposite result, not despondency but energy. ἀθυμῶσιν] ‘_lose heart, become spiritless_’, i.e. ‘go about their task in a listless, moody, sullen frame of mind’. ‘_Fractus animus_’, says Bengel, ‘pestis juventutis’. In Xen. _Cyr._ i. 6. 13 ἀθυμία is opposed to προθυμία, and in Thuc. ii. 88 and elsewhere ἀθυμεῖν is opposed to θαρσεῖν.