Matthew Poole and continuators on Job 9:35

35. Then would I speak, and not fear him, but it is not so with me .

i. e. I would speak freely for my self, being freed from the dread of his Majesty, which takes away my spirit and courage, and stoppeth my mouth.

i. e. I am not free from his terrour, and therefore cannot and dare not plead my cause boldly with him; and so have nothing else to do but to ease my self by receiving my complaints, as he doth in the next words. Oth. thus, But I am not so with my self, i. e. I am in a manner besides my self, distracted with the terrours of God upon me. Or rather thus, For I am not s[illegible: 1+ letters] with my self, or in my own Conscience, as I perceive I am in your eyes; to wit, an Hypocrite and ungodly man. So this is a reason why he could speak to God without slavish fear, because he was conscious to himself of his own Integrity: I have a good Conscience within my self, and therefore could use boldness in speaking to God, provided he would not deal with me in strict justice, but upon the terms of grace and mercy which he hath proposed to sinners, and with allowance to humane Infirmities.

Marginal references: Heb. But I am not so with my self.